why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
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