I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
