Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
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