So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
