Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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