Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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