The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Randomize
