your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
