i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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