just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
