then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
