ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
