i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize
