you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I'm jealous of your bromance
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Randomize
