well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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