last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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