My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
