So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize