hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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