I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
