I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
