one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
