I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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