How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Randomize
