you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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