so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
