Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
