just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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