he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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