This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
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