just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
