I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
