the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Randomize
