i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
