This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize
