he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
did you just send me my own nude
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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