Just mADE A PArabola og urine
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Randomize
