i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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