Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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