In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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