I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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