I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
