he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
My vagina is officially offended.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
