The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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