grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
