I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
