That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize