I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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