..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Randomize
