Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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